I have a face, too.

My Life is a Number. 

Everything about my life is a number. My height, my weight, my factor levels, school IDs, medical accounts, credit cards, bills... Everything is a number.

I want to be more than just a number though. I want to be a name. I don't want to be a famous person, but I want to be recognized by my surroundings as something other than #582 or #763, or "Hey you!" I want people to recognize that I have a name.

At school I'm always referred to as "[Mother's name]'s  daughter" or "[Father's Name]'s kid", and don't get me wrong, I love my parents to death, but I want people to know me by my name. Not as someone's "kid". I hate people referring to me something other than my name.

I've had so many numbers that I've had to memorize that sometimes I wonder if it would be easier to just tattoo it to my forehead so the world could just see it, instead of people asking me for the ID number...

It just rubs me raw that I'm enrolled in all of my classes and none of my professors see me as a person. They see me as a number and a face, but no name. Out of all of my professors, not even one can recite back to me what my name is without looking at the roster first.

My doctors are always face down in my charts as they come in to the exam rooms. It bothers me that they don't even address me by my name, but cut right to the standard greeting of "How are you feeling, today?".  Maybe I'd be honest with you if you made eye contact, maybe I wouldn't; but, you won't ever know because you do not see me for anything else but a test tube and a dollar sign, Doc.

These numbers are my identity. Each different number is an identity. An identity with no name. A story with no beginning middle or end. A dead end. These chains may be tied to me as a an anchor, as a punishment, as chain to society; but I, I will not let them become my name.

I want to be someone. I want to be a friend. I want to be seen. I want to be heard. I want to live.

I have a name. I am Stacy. And I am a person with a face, not a number.